I have one teen and one pre-teen daughter. At any moment in time, there are emotions going crazy in my house! My initial reaction is frustration. "Can't we all just get along!" and then, I realize...
I let my reactions to their crazy fuel more crazy! I am a yoga instructor; I try to bring peace and calm to my yoga classes, but somehow instead of carrying that peace and calm to my daughters I have created more crazy!
I must focus on my actions and reactions to reflect peace and calm in those around me. How?
*Spend time each day with intentional thoughts of peace, calm, love and joy.
What does this look like? We can call it prayer, meditation, a combination of both. Each day I must be intentional with how I choose to allow my mind, body and spirit to interact with others. I like to begin my day with prayer. Asking for the Spirit to guide me throughout the day. I need to take more time to sit in peace (no distractions) for mediation and still my mind and body to be more receptive of the Spirit's guidance.
*Begin all intereactions with smiles, nice words and loving actions.
I look at pictures of myself, and if I don't have an intentional smile, my resting face does not exude joy. I have managed to walk around with a frowning face, even when I'm not upset about anything. I plan to make an effort to turn my resting face into a welcoming face! No one wants to be greeted with a grouch - intentional or not.
I need my initial interactions to be those of praise, and not instruction. Too many times I am focused on passing on a to-do list instead of taking a moment to enjoy the presence of those around me. It doesn't take long to pass along a compliment or nice greeting.
Along with my grouchy face, my body language also speaks volumes. Making an effort to give hugs and gentle, kind gestures allows others to feel the peace, love and calm in me. We all love gentle and kind greetings!
*Listen, completely, not interrupting - full attention.
I am so guilty of having a half conversation! Half of my mind is listening, while the other half is pre-occupied. Whether cooking, reading, on my phone/computer, tv or any other distraction I don't always give my full attention to those around me. When I'm not fully engaged with others, they feel their time with me isn't important. Feeling disregarded - intentional or unintentionally - is still a bad feeling. This full attention also helps me not be as reactive. I can focus on allowing the people around me to finish their thought and then give myself proper time to give appropriate feedback. I tend to blame my "rushed" thinking and responding on my time as a debater in college. There was no time to sit back and "ponder"! But, I need to keep reminding myself that my children, husband and family are not on a debate team with me. They want loving, not reactive responses.
I will let you know how focusing on my actions and reactions help with the interactions of those around me. My feelings of frustrations in others will only continue to grow unless I make the choice to change. So, I encourage you to think about an area of your life that causes frustration for you and how can you be the change?